Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Foreign.
[00:00:05] Hi there, it's Tracy. And welcome back to flirting after 40.
[00:00:10] Very exciting news. I took a trip. And I told you guys last week I was going to. But I didn't say much about it to catch you up. I was just feeling insanely stressed out about work, my ex and the riffs. Several riffs. We've been having the. The split with J Man, summer with the kids.
[00:00:38] I was just having a really hard time and I was feeling like work was definitely one of the, like, a huge part of it where, you know when you get in these funks where you can't just. It's just really hard to get out. Like, it's not like you can sleep on it and the next day you're like, okay, we can let that go. It was just. It was a.
[00:00:58] Like my body was holding on to all this stuff.
[00:01:02] And so I, like, had. I just randomly booked a trip like two weeks ago because my friend was saying I was like, oh, I should go to maybe like Cancun or like, what should I do? And she was like, well, Cabo. Cabo is really close.
[00:01:18] I did not realize.
[00:01:20] Cabo is fucking amazing.
[00:01:23] I did not realize It's a two and a half hour flight from Denver and it's like Arizona or Palm Springs meets the ocean.
[00:01:34] It felt a lot like Costa Rica to me in the sense of the water and the people.
[00:01:42] People were extremely nice.
[00:01:47] Like, it's not like Costa Rica for the vegetation and the animals, but it was perfect. It was like 80s, not humid, dry heat.
[00:02:00] I booked with some points and for. For the Hyatt and for my flight, and it was a bougie hotel. And. You know, it's funny, when Jamie and I had booked our trip, I was really worried about the finances of it and stuff. And, um, I. I think I so desperately needed this.
[00:02:24] That, like, I. I was like, I don't fucking care. Um, I mean, I still booked it with points and things, but it's. It was still a bougie place.
[00:02:34] Um, and it was. It was amazing. I had.
[00:02:42] Well, I love baths. Bath. So it had a. This huge bathtub, had a great shower. It had a plunge pool.
[00:02:52] It was. I. It was. The resort was pretty much. It felt very empty, so I felt like every pool I was at, I almost had my own pool. It was fascinating.
[00:03:03] And it's right on the ocean. And so you get the ocean. You can't swim where I was, but you get these huge waves, but you're at the pool. I don't know. It was.
[00:03:15] It was totally perfect.
[00:03:17] And I don't know. I'm just so excited I found this place, Cabo in general, you know, And. And people ask me a lot, like, traveling by myself, what it's like. And even. Even J Man had said, like, because I had told him he should go to Sedona by himself when we split, and he was like, oh, no. Like, that would. No, that would be horrible. But I don't know. I. I like traveling by myself, and I know, like, I've. It's taken me a long time to get comfortable with it, and I did have some moments during this trip where I was like, oh, I really wish I had somebody with me more for, like, sharing food and just to have somebody to do things with. But I read three books.
[00:04:10] I.
[00:04:11] I don't know. Like, people watching is amazing. Like, there is this couple. Oh, my gosh. But, like, I wish I had somebody to talk to with the people watching because, like, there was this couple, and his job really was just to take pictures of her and, like, take a picture of me standing and looking out into the ocean in the pools. Take a picture with me with, like, this. And it was just.
[00:04:34] It was obnoxious.
[00:04:36] They were probably 30, I would guess, but just so obnoxious. G.
[00:04:48] But, yeah, I don't have a lot of, like, good. There wasn't a lot of good gossip or good stories to tell you guys.
[00:04:54] I did.
[00:04:59] So as much as I'm like, people should travel by yourselves, and you should. You guys should go out and do these things. I'm also a kind of a scaredy cat.
[00:05:11] I usually primarily stay at the resort. I don't venture out a lot unless I have people with me.
[00:05:20] But I'm also trying to be braver and do things that make me uncomfortable. So I.
[00:05:32] My friend sent me a couple recommendations. A shop I should try out and a place for a mojito. And I. I was like, it was Saturday. I was. I was texting with my sister, and I was like, I really want to go, but I'm scared. I'm scared of, like, I don't know where to go. Like, I don't know how to do this. And, yeah, I speak, you know, a tiny, tiny bit of Spanish. But, like, I was really. I was like, I. I want to do this. I can be brave. And then I was like, no. Nope, I'll just order a bottle of wine and sit by the pool.
[00:06:02] Um, but, like, Sunday morning, I woke up, I don't know, really early. I haven't been sleeping, but I woke up really early and I was like, okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do this. Like, I'm gonna, I can do this. So I ordered an Uber and I talked to the concierge a little bit about it and I, I, what I thought was the address for the shop I wanted to go to, put it in the address.
[00:06:30] And my Uber comes and it's a ass car, which is, it's fine. It's Mexico. It's like, I, I'm not, I just was nervous, like, and I don't know, I've never been here before. I don't know exactly where I'm going. Like, I looked at a map, I figured, okay. Like, I had an idea. But so I put the address in for the shop and we're driving and he does not speak any English. And I didn't have Translate on my phone because I was just like, I'm going to be at the res. Like, I'm going to be at the resort. Like, I'll be fine. But I hindsight, I probably should have had a Translate app on my phone.
[00:07:13] So we're driving and I, he like, gets off the, this, like the two lane road, the freeway, two lane road, road. And is like driving kind of up through a, A neighborhood, not a great neighborhood.
[00:07:30] And I could see on the Uber app, it's like your destination is one minute away. And I'm like, this does not look like any town that I've ever been to.
[00:07:42] And he like, stops wherever my address said. And it's like there's like a little dirt road and then there's a pickleball court and some little like, houses, casitas.
[00:08:00] I don't know.
[00:08:02] I'm like, this is definitely not the right place. And I'm like, fuck, fuck, fuck. Like, panic, Tracy. But this is like my worst fear, like, And I'm like, you know, And I'm like, so he doesn't speak any English. And I'm like, okay, well, I'm like, I'm not like, don't get out of the car. Because, like, I don't know where I am. Like, seriously, there's this dirt road. Don't get out of the car.
[00:08:32] Because that wouldn't be safe.
[00:08:35] Like, be smart.
[00:08:37] And I don't have the Translate app, so I can't say, like, this is the wrong address because I don't know how to. I was just like, like, no, a key. Not here, not here.
[00:08:50] And he's like looking at me like, well, lady, where the hell you want to go? So I realized I could add a. You could Add a. Add another stop in your Uber. And so I just was like. So I just typed in marina, and he's like, ah, okay. Like, kind of like that makes more sense.
[00:09:10] So it was, like, another 15 minutes. So I have no idea where the. I, like, had taken myself.
[00:09:19] And I had a moment of panic, but I didn't. But then he drops me at the Marina, and it's, like, probably, like, where the employees go in. It's kind of like behind the dumpster in an alley. And I'm like, oh, my God. Just. But I'll get out of the car, Tracy, because at least, like, you're somewhere where you could figure this out, you know? But, yeah, like, I had. It was really hard to orient. Orient myself to where I was. I had to, like, go through this little alley and all the mean, you know? Meanwhile, I'm like, I'm gonna, like, Seriously, I'm gonna die. This is what you get for traveling alone. But I didn't die.
[00:10:00] And I got to see some of Cabo, and I made it to the shop that my friend told me about, bought a cute pair of earrings, and I have a story, you know, and then, like, I ended up. I. At that point, though, I was like, I just. I. I. I've had enough, like, enough fun. I'm headed back. So I got an Uber and went back. I was probably gone, like, a whole, like, 45 minutes. But I was very proud of myself, that I was brave, and I. I did that. So baby steps, you know, we all have to, you know, start somewhere. Or, like, I'm sure half my friends would be like, oh, my God, I can't believe you were worried about Cabo. But we all have different levels, I think, of where we're comfortable. And I was proud of myself for stepping out of, you know, my comfort zone.
[00:10:55] So go to Cabo. It's beautiful.
[00:10:59] I don't know. I. I was just. It was so. It was so beautiful. So anyways, I am back, and I feel so much better. I feel lighter, happier. I missed my kids, even.
[00:11:13] I just feel restored. And it's probably because I'm, you know, working on, like, three different businesses, and I just never really stopped, and I did nothing there.
[00:11:25] So, yeah, it was really, really amazing.
[00:11:31] And so I was reading. I read a book there, and this was sent to me by my friend who shout out to her and her business.
[00:11:40] Firefly Scout recommended this book to me, and it's called it was your soul. Mail has arrived. I think that's what it was called, but it's Soul mail, if you looked it up and it is about, it's, it's a story that the.
[00:12:01] I'm going to mess it up. But it's essentially about, if you had the opportunity to know who your soulmate is, would you look at it?
[00:12:14] And it's this idea that everyone has a soulmate. And this one day, all of a sudden, Everybody that was 18 or older got a email that said the name of your soulmate and their birthday and that was it. And you can't delete the email, but you don't have to open it.
[00:12:38] And that everybody that's like, opening it, that they all are, it could, it could be your.
[00:12:45] Someone you never met. It could be your parent, it could be your daughter.
[00:12:50] It just was like, this is your, who your soulmate is.
[00:12:55] And this whole idea around, like, do you believe in that? Number one. And would you open it? Number two?
[00:13:04] And I, I thought it was a great book. It was a very, like, interesting idea. I, I, it's for as jaded and as skeptical as I am, I do believe in it. And I believe, I don't know, that we have just one soulmate.
[00:13:25] But isn't that what. I guess that's what a soulmate is. It's the one person. But I like to believe that and that, you know, the people you meet are. They all help. I mean, they all transform who you are and help you grow. And there's love in many ways. But that you have this soul connection with one person.
[00:13:50] Would you look?
[00:13:52] At first I was like, no, I wouldn't look, because I would, like, I would want to be able to experience my life and make the decision I make out of free will versus going to find this person.
[00:14:06] Or like, that's your sole purpose is like, I have to find this person. Like, we're supposed to be together. Why aren't we together? But, like, maybe now is not the right time to be together. I don't know.
[00:14:16] And then I was like, oh, no, I'm so impatient. I would absolutely look.
[00:14:23] Yeah, I'm curious. Like, let me know. Like, would you want to know if you could know who your soulmate was, would you want to know?
[00:14:32] And you know, like, what if it's not the person you're with? Would you change your life to then go find that person?
[00:14:41] You know, like, what if you're married and you get it and your soulmate is, you know, somebody else, the mechanic down the street and not your husband? Do you leave your husband for the mechanic down the street? Do you? I mean, I Hope. I don't know. I hope not. But do you get to know the mechanic and then you realize like he's your other half of your soul? I. Your heart. Your like, I don't know.
[00:15:04] Fascinating book. And um, I thank her for the recommendation.
[00:15:10] And if you guys are looking for like it's, it's a pretty light, easy read, but it's also romantic and it makes you think. And I'm not gonna give away the end, but the ending is great. It, it just. But it does make. I like books that make you think about something even though you know it's just a easy reading novel.
[00:15:35] Did. And I think I do believe in soulmates. And I probably maybe wouldn't have looked before, like in my 20s, but I definitely, I think I would look now for sure.
[00:16:02] All right, and then other exciting news today.
[00:16:06] Today is day 365 of me not having a period. I know you all care about my menstrual cycle, but that officially means I am in menopause.
[00:16:19] Woohoo. Yay. Yay.
[00:16:25] I'm young for menopause.
[00:16:28] 46 is pretty young.
[00:16:30] But I did some re reading, you know, and that's how I. It was like everything before that is pre perimenopause. Anyways, I know you guys probably don't care about this, but I had joked with J man that I was going to have a menopause party on this day.
[00:16:48] I'm not having a menopause party, but I did post it on social media because I, you know what, like we celebrate all these other things like, and women are so alone in this. I feel like, you know, women's health is so, so underrepresented. And I just was like, let's just put it out there because I don't know, I think it's funny and I think it sucks.
[00:17:17] I think women's bodies are magical and what we have to go through fucking sucks.
[00:17:22] So celebrating menopause day.
[00:17:27] Gonna go out with my friend for some wine and I told her we're celebrating me entering menopause. Hot flashes, rage, Night sweats, not being able to sleep, like all of a sudden. I swear to God, I wake up at 5 o' clock every day now.
[00:17:48] 3 and 5.
[00:17:52] So anyways, those are of you that are on your way in menopause.
[00:17:58] Let me know how it goes for you guys. I'll keep you posted on my story. I don't know, I just, you know, sometimes we just need to celebrate the moments, the little moments.
[00:18:12] So we're celebrating today.
[00:18:16] All right. You Guys, I don't really have any big funnies today. I. Because I was really off my phone a lot and relaxing. But there was one that this. This group posted and this. This guy actually posted. It says dating resume. Dating resume. And it looks like it's definitely by AI. Not looking for perfect, perfect, Just intentional.
[00:18:46] He has an about me section. He enjoy what, you know, I enjoy, what I'm looking for, what I want.
[00:18:55] Green flags, deal breakers. But he's building. He's building a stable future, financial freedom, travel experiences, and a life that inspires. I'm not just trying to impress.
[00:19:08] Oh, sorry. I'm not trying to impress. I'm just getting started.
[00:19:12] Vibes, a quote, and an ideal first date. Oh, my God. And it, like, reads like a fucking resume. Like his ideal first date. Good food, good conversation, live music or a lounge. And we'll see where the night takes us. Like, none of, like, what he's saying isn't bad, but, like an AI dating resume. Are we really at. To. To that point? I mean, sorry, it looks. I mean, it looks like a resume.
[00:19:40] And when he asks what. What I'm looking for a woman I can build with. You should have. And there's like, check marks. A career ambition, goals and drive, emotional intelligence, a good communicator, a peaceful spirit, a sense of humor, a mindset for growth.
[00:19:57] Like, are we really. Are we really doing dating resumes?
[00:20:02] And I'm sorry, a resume is about you.
[00:20:08] So, like, listing what you want in someone. I don't know if I like that. That's not really resume. Like, this feels more like a job application. Maybe that, like, it should be a.
[00:20:23] I don't know, because, like, a resume is really, really just your history and what you're about.
[00:20:32] Um, not. I mean, not like maybe a cover letter might have, like, what you're looking for, but, like, you're not going to be like, I'm looking for a job that pays me. Da, da, da, da da. Like, that's what this feels like.
[00:20:47] Ugh.
[00:20:48] So not like. Not a funny funny, like, gross funny. Just like, oh, my God, is this. What is.
[00:20:56] Is this. What is happening out there?
[00:21:00] I don't want to go back. I don't want to go back out.
[00:21:04] Yeah.
[00:21:07] All right, you guys.
[00:21:10] Thank you for listening.
[00:21:12] I am feeling in much better spirits after this and my trip, and I'm really looking forward to what the summer holds. I hope you guys have a great week, and I will talk to you soon. Bye.
