Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Foreign.
[00:00:04] Hi there. Welcome back to flirting after 40.
[00:00:09] So I am recording. This is on a Tuesday night in my bed.
[00:00:15] My kids are here in my house.
[00:00:18] But I. I was feeling the need. And I've recorded this, like, twice because I've had issues with my recordings. But anyways, I'm. I'm persever. Persevering pers.
[00:00:30] And perspiring the.
[00:00:33] I felt this need to record tonight.
[00:00:37] So tonight is December 30th, tomorrow's New Year's Eve, And I don't know, I felt this draw to record one more episode before the end of the year, even though I don't know what I'm going to do the next year, if I'm going to keep the podcast or not. But I really felt this need to connect and share and talk about the things I want to talk about.
[00:01:07] New Year's for me, I am not a huge New Year's fan.
[00:01:11] I've never been. I was telling Jay Manley this week that, like, one of my happiest New years, I was living in San Francisco, and I bought. I want to see, like, an Xbox, and I got some sushi takeout, and I played Xbox for probably, like, eight hours by myself in my little tiny studio apartment.
[00:01:34] And it was so amazing. And it was so amazing because it was just exactly what I wanted to do for myself at the time.
[00:01:44] And I know, like, we don't always get to choose what we want to do for the holidays.
[00:01:52] And this year I'm. I am letting my kids have friends over to spend the night, so I'm gonna have, like, five kids in my house. And I invited Jamie on over. But, like, the things I want to do maybe are not always what I really want to do, but I'm trying to embrace what they want to do. So. Also, New Year's, I always like to choose a word, a word of the year, a word that will lead the path of what you would like to accomplish in the year or how you would like to feel in the year.
[00:02:37] And we could revisit my past years, and I can tell you about that.
[00:02:41] But this year, I was thinking the word believe.
[00:02:47] And I was thinking that word because I find that every time I doubt myself or think that one of the businesses I have won't work or that I won't find love or that I.
[00:03:11] I don't know, that I'm doomed in some way, something happens and it re. Energizes me, and it makes me believe that there is something out there that is working in my favor because I'M showing up and I'm putting in the work.
[00:03:33] But I can't choose the word believe because the lieutenant you guys have heard about, he's a whole like lasso fan and his LinkedIn is all about believe.
[00:03:52] Tim, Tim Lass, Tom Lasso. I don't even know what the fuck it's called.
[00:03:57] So I asked Alex, you know my chat, GT P, T, G, T, P, jet, whatever.
[00:04:05] Anyways, I was like, I need a different word.
[00:04:09] And he gave me several, several words, like probably 20 words.
[00:04:13] But I liked the word receive.
[00:04:19] And his response was, because you've earned softer days.
[00:04:25] Now, I don't know that I've earned softer days. But he also says like, you've done the work, now let it land.
[00:04:33] And that resonated with me.
[00:04:37] I have done work. I've done so much work on myself.
[00:04:41] I've been seeing a therapist for like the last nine years.
[00:04:45] I, I just, I have to maybe let go and receive the things that are coming to me.
[00:04:54] So he says, receive is such a grown woman world word. It says I'm not chasing, I'm not proving, I'm not going uphill. I'm open, I'm ready, I'm here.
[00:05:10] He says, you've done the work, now let it land.
[00:05:15] That feels really uncomfortable to me to know that, to kind of take a pause in pushing all the things forward.
[00:05:25] He says, let's be clear. This is not sit on the couch and wait. This is showing up without force, saying yes without over explaining.
[00:05:37] Okay?
[00:05:38] Allowing good things to arrive without suspicion, trusting that you don't have to audition for what is meant for you.
[00:05:48] It's the opposite of pushing the boulder uphill. It's stepping out of the way of your own life.
[00:05:55] How do you step out of the way of your own life?
[00:06:00] Receive. So receive is going to be my word for 2026.
[00:06:08] Do less, receive more.
[00:06:11] And he says, you know, a gentle reminder on hard days is I don't need to chase what's already finding me.
[00:06:21] And he says, honestly, this word fits exactly where you are in life. In love, work, and life. You've been the builder, the fixer, the holder. Together, 2026 feels like the year you can let yourself be, be met.
[00:06:39] I don't even know what all that means, but I felt like I needed to share it with you guys and I would love to hear what your words are.
[00:06:52] I receive that is so uncomfortable to me. I'm so bad at receiving.
[00:06:59] But there's something about that word that is calling to me because like, believe is this.
[00:07:09] Believe is still doing, you know, believe is you still have force in it. Receive you don't you receive is that you have done the work.
[00:07:23] And I'm not going to stop doing the work. But you've done the work and you are here to receive what the world is bringing you and to trust the world.
[00:07:40] J Man and I are going on a trip next week, so I won't be recording next week unless it goes horribly bad. And I have a lot of time on my hands, but I have a lot of.
[00:07:58] Not a lot, but I have a little anxiety about it. Like, I asked him even today, like, do you plan on working during the trip?
[00:08:08] I keep waiting to be let down.
[00:08:14] And that's not receiving.
[00:08:17] That's like forecasting. That's getting in your head and creating drama that's not even there.
[00:08:24] So what if I just stopped and received what was coming?
[00:08:32] I don't know. Like, I will have to bookmark this podcast and come back to it to see if this works. It makes me really uncomfortable.
[00:08:50] And I'll have to do a podcast where I go back and look at my journals and find words that were my previous words for the year to see.
[00:09:01] Yeah, if those came true or if that manifested something. Because I do believe in manifestation.
[00:09:08] Maybe I'll do that tomorrow.
[00:09:11] But while I was on this kind of kick tonight, I.
[00:09:17] I was listening to music.
[00:09:19] And I haven't talked a lot about music here, but music is.
[00:09:28] It's such a core part of my being. And when people ask me, like, who are your. Who's your favorite artist or what are your favorite songs? It makes me really uncomfortable because I don't have an answer.
[00:09:41] I don't have a, like a favorite genre. I don't have a favorite song. I don't have a favorite band.
[00:09:47] Like, my, my music, my mood is influenced by the music and my music is influenced by my mood.
[00:09:56] So music to me represents people and moment, not necessarily just like what I like.
[00:10:09] So I tonight created a playlist in Spotify and I called it Songs that Make me Think of Others.
[00:10:24] I'm going to post this on my Instagram a link to my Spotify of songs that make me think of others.
[00:10:31] And I think I can't tell how many songs there are in here, but there's four hours and 33 minutes of play.
[00:10:41] And I chose songs that may give me a deep feeling of someone when I hear them. And a lot of like, not just it's not a moment, it is of a person.
[00:10:57] So every song in that. That four hours and 33 minutes.
[00:11:02] If I play it makes like, gives me an immediate reaction to a person.
[00:11:11] And I'm going to encourage you guys to do this because, like, I have a list of favorites and I have lists of songs that make me feel something but not about a person.
[00:11:24] So these were like, every song belongs to a person in my life.
[00:11:35] I'm gonna post this and I, I like, I really genuinely want you guys to go on my Instagram and look at the Spotify and download it or, you know, whatever, like follow the whatever it's called playlist and listen. Because I feel like almost everyone that listens to this will have a song. There are a couple people that I realized though, don't have a song and that makes me kind of sad. Like my friend Kathy.
[00:12:12] I don't know that I have a. Like, I don't know that I have a song that when I hear that song, I think of her.
[00:12:23] Like, I need to work on this. I think there's a lot of songs that make me think of my sister. There's a lot of songs that make me think of like my college friend Kara. There's a lot of songs that make me think of my exes, Amber, my.
[00:12:45] Like, I don't know, I want to. I want to know. Like, if you hear, like, you could just send me a message. You don't have to post, but send me a message. Message. If you like listen to this and you're like that you heard my song. Like, it was really fun. It was really fun to do. And I don't know what it means, but I think music kind of like words.
[00:13:09] Like a word of the year brings us back.
[00:13:13] It helps us remember the people that are in our lives. It helps us remember the love that we have shared with others.
[00:13:28] Yeah, I don't know. I just.
[00:13:31] I am feeling very grateful for a new year.
[00:13:36] I met with my friend Wendy and we were Talking about the 2025 was the year of the snake and. And shedding and growing and that 2026 is the year of the horse.
[00:13:54] And it's about coming into your power and about like you've shed. You've. From the year of the snake. You have shed the things you that no longer do. You bring you purpose that no longer do anything for you. And the year of the horse is this like coming into yourself and acknowledging that.
[00:14:22] I'm not a totally woo person, but I am.
[00:14:25] I don't know enough about it right now to speak knowledgeably. Knowledgeably about it. But I kind of loved the idea that 2025 was a year that just kind of shit.
[00:14:43] And we had things to lose. Like, we just all needed to shed a layer or multiple layers.
[00:14:51] And that 2026, a horse. Like, I think I told you guys that I did a horse retreat with a friend and how horses, they pick up on your energy, and they show up in a way that you need them to show up and you can't.
[00:15:17] Like, they. They are a breed on their own. That is, you're not going to bully them around. They're there with a purpose.
[00:15:29] And you.
[00:15:34] I'm probably not articulating this well, but they will show you what you need.
[00:15:42] And I kind of am looking at that for 2026, the year of the horse.
[00:15:48] They will show you what you need.
[00:15:50] They will. The horse will show up. The horses will show up in the capacity that you need.
[00:15:57] Even if you don't believe it, even if it feels a little surreal.
[00:16:06] I don't know. And then, you know, like, choosing a word like receive is that I am open to their gifts. I am open to the gifts of others because I. I have been feeding into this world work relationships heavily, and maybe this year will be the year that I am open to receiving things back. It. It doesn't have to be big things, but I look at it as maybe a way of acknowledging everything that I've put out into the world will show back up for me.
[00:17:01] Whoo.
[00:17:03] Okay. I feel like, again, I. I feel like sometimes I just ramble, but I felt like this was kind of an important thing to say out loud for me.
[00:17:15] And whether anybody listens or not great or not great, I don't know.
[00:17:25] Yeah. You guys, I'm wishing you all very happy New Year and made the horse show up for all of us.
[00:17:38] I.
[00:17:41] Yeah. I will keep you guys posted on my journey. I won't be posting next week because I'm going to be on vacation, and I'm really hoping it goes well.
[00:17:51] If it doesn't, then we have lots more to talk about on this podcast.
[00:18:00] Yeah.
[00:18:01] So.
[00:18:03] Oh, I have one thing to share. Okay.
[00:18:07] I love.
[00:18:08] I know you guys are probably tired of hearing about the movies I love.
[00:18:14] They're not particularly elegant or great cinematic movies. Anyways, the movie New Year's Eve I love. And I love it because the same reason I love love, actually, it's about all these people interconnecting and coming together.
[00:18:39] But this quote from Claire Morgan in New Year's Eve is one of my favorite quotes I've ever heard or read.
[00:18:50] Okay. She's talking about the ball.
[00:18:53] Who the the the ball at Times Square that is, she's trying to fix because it's stuck and she says it's suspended there to remind us before you pop the champagne and celebrate the new year, to stop and reflect on the year that has gone by, to remember both our triumphs and our missteps, our promises made and broken, the time we opened ourselves up to great adventures or closed ourselves down for fear of getting hurt.
[00:19:26] Because that's what New Year's is all about, getting another chance. A chance to forgive, to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more and to stop worrying about what if and start embracing what will be.
[00:19:45] So when that ball drops at midnight and it will drop, let's remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other, and not just tonight, but all year long.
[00:19:58] Ah, what an amazing quote.
[00:20:02] That is my wish for all of you, for me.
[00:20:08] And I will see you and talk to you guys in the new Year.
