Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Foreign.
[00:00:06] Hi there, it's Tracy. Welcome to flirting after 40.
[00:00:11] Oh. Every week I feel like I take a deep breath when I do this and I. I wish that, like, one week I didn't and I had something.
[00:00:25] Some amazing news and some joyful content to share. It's unfortunately just not that way right now. I have been targeted now on Facebook, 8 mature single women. And there's a picture of this lovely woman sitting on a bed that looks like it's her grandmother's or our grandmothers or our great grandmothers with the dust ruffle and the pink duvet that is flat and the flat pillows, and she's, like, sitting there posing in her fuck. I'm not that.
[00:01:15] Like, these ads keep posting post, like, showing up for me on Facebook. And I don't. Like, I. I know I'm older.
[00:01:26] I know I'm 45 years old.
[00:01:31] I don't feel like I need Facebook to remind me that I'm old. Like, it. But they feel like really old. Like, I don't. I don't feel like 45 is old.
[00:01:47] I feel like I still do the things I want to do. I'm still active.
[00:01:53] I have young kids.
[00:01:56] I don't know, but I used to joke about the Bachelor and that they should have a single. Like an older, single, single bachelor. Like, they should have a. An older bachelor instead of these 19 to 25 year olds. They should have someone that is, like, I don't know, 30 to 50.
[00:02:21] And then they did that and it was a flop.
[00:02:26] And now I'm getting all these mature, mature dating requests on Facebook.
[00:02:38] I just can't.
[00:02:40] So I got off of all of my dating apps and I just chose to get off of it. I was just annoyed. And I feel like today I'm. I'm just in a mood. Like, I want to run people off the road. And don't get me wrong, I'm not going to hurt anybody. I'm just in this mood of intolerance.
[00:03:05] And that's how I felt about the dating apps. Like, I was just intolerant of the.
[00:03:12] I kept seeing and I'm intolerant of the haze and the shitty comments and the sh. Just responses. So I deleted all of my profiles. I, like, closed everything down.
[00:03:34] And then my friend, she reached out to me. She's like, you know, I know you decided to not do all this anymore, but I heard about this dating at Raw or R, but I'm going to call it Raw because I don't know what else to call it where it's supposed to be a. An app where, you know, it. It gets rid of catfish because you have to post a selfie every day.
[00:04:06] So I'm like, okay, I'll try it, y'all. It's.
[00:04:13] It's worse than the others. Um, I actually do have some funnies for you today at the end. But, like, an 18 year old like, me liked me. I'm. I can't. I can't. Like, why the is an 18 year old liking a 45 year old? I mean, yes, I'm amazing, but I'm 45 and you're 18. So. Last week I shared. Or the last two weeks I shared with you guys.
[00:04:45] A lot of it was a pretty big story, a pretty impactful moment in my life, and.
[00:04:55] And I was feeling kind of down and I was feeling like.
[00:05:04] Like, I just don't want to do this anymore.
[00:05:09] And I think probably a lot of people that are in my situation that are dating or trying to date feel that often, like, why am I doing this?
[00:05:24] I don't. I don't know if you guys believe in things like this, but sometimes the universe shows you what you need. Last week I got a call from a guy who I haven't talked to in Legit Pro. Like, really talked to, and probably 17, 18 years ago. It's. It's been a really, really long time.
[00:05:53] So I'm. I'm working, doing my thing. I get this call. I don't have the number on my phone, and I check my voicemail and it says, let's call him Sam.
[00:06:09] I can't think of another name right now. Hey, hey, Trace, it's Sam.
[00:06:15] I know we haven't talked in a while. I am just calling to say hi and catch up. Give me a call.
[00:06:21] And I'm like. Like, I think I actually. Well, I did. I actually texted him and I said, like, holy. Like, are you okay? Like, why? I haven't heard. Like, why haven't heard from you in forever? Like, are you okay? Like, what's up?
[00:06:38] And he texted back, yeah, I'm good. Just wanted to catch up with you. Give me a call.
[00:06:44] You can.
[00:06:47] And I'm kind of a skeptic in the way of like, okay, he must be calling me because he needs something.
[00:06:56] Like, people don't just call you just to call you. So our backstory is we met in San Francisco after divorce number one, and we met at work and I eventually became his boss. So this is my, like, one and only bad indiscretion work story. But we started. We started kind of dating. We never Even, like we were never even a couple or anything like that. We kind of started dating when I was not his boss, but he is five years younger than me, so I guess maybe I'm a baby cougar.
[00:07:40] I don't know, like, maybe. Oh God. Like he was young at the time. I mean, I was young too. So. And I'm going to say there is something really exciting about workplace flirt, flirting, romance.
[00:08:01] Like, you want to go to work? Maybe that's how we should encourage people to come back to the office. By encouraging people to date within the office. Because you know what? That's a pretty fucking great idea. But I, I really looked forward to seeing him every day.
[00:08:27] Anyways, we, we were young. I was living out of a hotel, I was living out of the Hyatt in San Francisco and he would come hang out with me.
[00:08:39] I remember we just had a really great time. He had an apartment in San Francisco and we would hang out and drink beer, eat pizza. God, to be young and eat jalapeno potato chips and play Guitar Hero for hours and then make out or fuck or whatever. And it was just this glorious time of my life.
[00:09:11] So anyways, Sam. Is that what I call him? Okay, so Sam calls me and I'm, I'm skeptical. I'm like, dude, why are you calling me? And he, he's like, hey, like I'm starting a new job. I'm going to be living in a hotel in San Francisco temporarily, like three days a week. And I just, I thought of you, like and I thought about, I was thinking about all the good times we had. And we proceed to talk for three hours and, and given. I haven't talked to this person in 17 years. Like really.
[00:09:52] We talk for three hours, interrupted just about life and reminiscing, but not in a, not in a flirty way of like, I want to get back together with you. It was just, it just was a really nice like trip down memory lane. And I'm getting emotional because like the kindness that like he shared with me about how I hoped kind of shape him and he, he reminded me, he said, he said, do you remember you found my apartment for me?
[00:10:52] And I actually like, I, I know the apartment he's talking about, but I don't remember finding it for him, but it sounds like 100% something I would do. And he said, you found that apartment for me. And you guys, it was a killer apartment in San Francisco. It was in this basement and it had a walk up little patio. It was a one bedroom. Like it was Killer. It was so good in the marina.
[00:11:19] And he said, you know, you found me this place. And he said I have moved back there, like left there and moved back there three times.
[00:11:30] And you know, like, I probably romanticize like the relationship we have had or whatever, but like I did something good for someone and they called to tell me that, like with no agenda and called to tell me that they think of me often, you know, like not, not again, not in this romantic way. But I don't know, it was like I needed that and I didn't even know I needed it. And like the universe brought it back and the conversation was so easy and fun.
[00:12:33] Like, like what I would like out of a partner.
[00:12:40] I mean, okay, you guys have heard me say, like I don't like to talk on the phone.
[00:12:45] So talking to somebody for three hours that you haven't talked to and you don't even know if you have anything in common anymore was amazing. And, and he remembered things that I told him about my family, like things about my dad. And it's, it's, it was such a good reminder that some of these relationships transform their lives in our lives. And I think, yeah, I think I needed it in this, in, at this time. I needed that reminder that the love I have to give is good and that it touched someone and like, it might not equate to, you know, my person long term or, but we really had a fucking good time together. And, and he remembers, you know, me showing up for him and he remembers the good things.
[00:14:11] I think it's funny, he told me that I was the only person he's had room service with ever. So I'm like, oh my God, dude, you gotta, you gotta live a little, little more. So it was pretty sweet.
[00:14:26] And then I reminded myself, because I did a post here about I hate Valentine's Day, that he and I were together on a Valentine's Day and I was living in the hotel and in downtown San Francisco there was a pillow fight where people just came out from wherever you were and it was an all on pillow fight of people.
[00:15:01] And, and he was like, oh my God, I hadn't even, like, I, I, I haven't ever thought of that ever again.
[00:15:08] And like I have this memory of that and then I was able to share it with him.
[00:15:14] And then the world I feel like works a very funny way because I took my kids this weekend on a staycation and we went to a hotel about 40 minutes away from my house, just me and the boys and just a little like, because I, I Couldn't do a big spring break. So I was like, we're gonna just, just a couple days away.
[00:15:41] And I kid you not, I turned the TV on one night and we're eating pizza and salads in bed and you know, just like winding down and there is a pillow fight competition on the tv. I don't even know this exists. Okay, but on ESPN or whatever it was, there was a national pillow fight regional, whatever, fucking like, are you kidding me?
[00:16:17] And, and I know this all probably is out there normally, but to me it feels like such a coincidence that I was feeling really down. I get this call, we reminisce, we talk about pillow fights, I take my kids on this thing and then there's this pillow fight competition. And I don't know what the fuck any of this means except I feel like the universe is talking to me. Don't know what it's talking to me about yet.
[00:16:50] Maybe to go get my ass in a pillow fight, I don't know. But what a random phone call to receive. And how amazing is it to have someone pop back into your life that you never expect to hear from again and hear beautiful things about yourself and be able to share that back. And I just feel so fortunate and lucky for that. So my God, our funny for the day. Okay, Getting on raw y'all shit is off the hook there.
[00:17:33] There's this 64 year old man who liked me.
[00:17:39] Oh, he says I prefer monogamy. Other choices are negotiable. I do like sex daily. And you guys, when I'm 64 I get sex daily.
[00:17:53] But I am being a little judgy because he was like really, he looked really, really, really really old.
[00:18:01] So I get the 18 year old liking me and then I get the 64 year old liking me. Like what am I supposed to do with that? Another guy says something I would like to try again and he answers a threesome.
[00:18:21] Like good, I don't blame you dude. Like that's go you. But if you're trying to get a date and you say you're monogamous, putting you would like putting that you would like a threesome on your profile is probably not the best thing to do.
[00:18:43] And for the win I get a like interested in amazing dick from someone who won't promise you a load of bullshit. He never meant just to give you his mid level dick and start acting like the insecure nipple hunting grown ass little man child that can't look himself in the mirror and dumps it on you for trying to love his sorry ass, question mark, so.
[00:19:13] Okay, you guys, I can't believe I'm gonna say this. Hmu. I don't know what that means.
[00:19:18] I should have looked at before I posted this. And if you do somehow find your way into my field, just know I will. Love you so. I love you.
[00:19:31] All right, thanks, you guys.
[00:19:35] Like, I can't even make up the atrociousness of this profile or all or all of that. It's a show out there, and I don't know what to do about it. Like, I. I don't know how to overcome this. I tried a new app. I don't think this is my place, but.
[00:19:59] Time will tell, but.
[00:20:05] Oh, my God. Okay, so please send me. Send me some men, please.
[00:20:13] I. I'm telling you guys, I have a finder's fee. Like, send me good people.
[00:20:19] Recommend me to your friends. I don't know, like this. It can't get much worse than it is.
[00:20:25] Thank you guys for listening.
[00:20:28] Always a pleasure. And I will talk to you next week.
