Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Foreign.
[00:00:04] Hi there, it's Tracy. Welcome to flirting after 40.
[00:00:08] So this. This last week, I have some exciting news. I.
[00:00:16] I talked to Sam on the phone twice for, like, at least a total of like four, four and a half hours. He called last week and then he called on Sunday night. And it's funny because my first podcast, I was talking about how I hate talking on the phone.
[00:00:33] And I guess I meant I hate talking on the phone to people I don't really want to talk on the phone to, or the people that make that a prerequisite of dating them or. I don't know. Clearly I have no issues talking to him on the phone.
[00:00:50] And it's.
[00:00:52] It's easy, it's fun.
[00:00:56] It's such a weird feeling to talk to someone that you haven't talked to in, you know, so many years and have it just pick back up. Like, you've always been talking. And I mean, obviously there's a lot of, you know, lot to catch up on. Um, but the comfort is there.
[00:01:24] And, like, he understands my humor, I understand his.
[00:01:30] We allow space for, like, serious conversations as well as just catching up.
[00:01:36] I don't know, it.
[00:01:39] It's kind of fucking nice.
[00:01:42] And it gives me hope.
[00:01:47] Like, actual hope.
[00:01:52] So last night, I feel like he called with a mission. And the mission was, you know, to let me know he was thinking about me and that he would like to get together.
[00:02:04] Woo. And not that I hadn't been thinking about him, because I have. It's just.
[00:02:09] It's been. It's. It's hard for me to get excited almost again. But I am excited. And the thing that I think I'm most excited about is that he's putting in effort. Like, he's showing up.
[00:02:26] And I. And I know that sounds kind of ridiculous to be like, well, you've talked on the phone three times. Like, that's not really effort. No, that's fucking big effort. Like, the fact that, like, it's almost like he's calling me on my bullshit text. Like, I'll text. Like, I think, like, I asked, like, how's the hotel? And he just calls me instead of, like, the text back and forth. Um, and last night he said that he, you know, would like to come see me at some point. We should figure that out. And, like, he had done some research on places in Denver that kind of lounges, like, a good bar vibe. I don't know exactly what vibe he's. He's hoping for, but that he had done some research on places that we should go.
[00:03:19] Okay. I Don't think I've had a guy. I'm really. I'm trying to think, really plan a date for me in probably three years, at least. That makes me a little sad that I. I haven't met, like, hat. Like, met people that are capable or want to do those things. And I've still accepted it, but it. This is a really nice reminder that. And. And I always say this, that, you know, men that want to date you will. Will find a way. Men that want to see you will find a way. Men that want, like, want to do the things, they will find a way. Like, it doesn't matter that he lives in California. I mean, it does matter, but he's still trying to figure out a plan to come see me and make it work. Like, that counts for a lot. A lot, a lot. I have no idea. I have no idea what will come from this.
[00:04:19] I know that I'm excited. I know that, you know, I have a. I have a list of attributes that I would like in a partner, and he has most of them. You guys. He's bald, too. I don't know if I mentioned that on the last episode, but for those that know me, they know I like bald guys. I don't know. It's a thing. Yeah, I'm cautiously optimistic.
[00:04:50] So, you know, my. My intent is to keep you guys posted on how it goes, but it's the first time in a long time I have felt seen, like, truly seen.
[00:05:05] And, like, effort is reciprocal or if not even more on his end than mine. And, yeah, I'm not really sure what to do with that.
[00:05:19] And so I'm going to share why it's hard for me to just, like, be in it and relax and just trust it. Because the last year, I haven't dated a whole ton, but every date I said I would say minus. You know, Sparky, every date has kind of just been a shit show.
[00:05:44] I went out with this. I'm gonna call him Jeep Commander because he drove a Jeep Commander. Okay. I'm not dogging too much, but I am a little bit on people who drive Jeep Commander. So for those who are unaware, it's a Jeep with a pickup truck. Pickup truck back. You know, like, best of both worlds. Yeah. I just think it's kind of dumb, but you either love it or you don't. But I think it's just.
[00:06:07] I don't know. I'm like, get a pickup truck or get a fucking Jeep. Anyway, moving on. Jeep Commander. And we met for a beer, and it actually was okay. Like, the beer part was.
[00:06:19] There was decent conversation. It was okay. So he asked if I would like to have dinner after that. And. And we were at a brewery. You could walk to a restaurant. And I said, sure. So we get to the restaurant, and it's an Italian place. Like, not anything special. Super, like, fancy or no reason for someone to be uncomfortable. And during that date, the dinner part, I maybe said five words. And you can see I have a fucking podcast. Like, I. I can talk. I know I can talk. And I. I can talk to anyone about almost anything. Like, I could sit and pick up a conversation with a stranger at a bar.
[00:06:58] So the fact that I didn't speak is telling that he just talked for a good hour, hour and a half, nonstop. Didn't ask me a single fucking question. Like, talked to the point of, like, telling me, like, about his best friend putting white rocks in front of his house and the HOA getting pissed off and like. Like a story that I'm. It's like, out of my brain right now because I just. Just can't fucking. Like, why would I want to keep this in my head?
[00:07:34] It was so bad.
[00:07:37] It was so bad.
[00:07:39] We leave.
[00:07:42] He walks me to my car, or I walked him to his cheap commander. I don't fucking remember. Say goodbye. And he texts me later, and he's like, I really want you. Like, I want you to know I had a really great time with you. I would love to take you out again. Like, I had to shut it down. I responded with a very nice message of, well, maybe it wasn't super nice. I said, you know, do you realize that from the entire date, like, the entire dinner, I didn't speak but more than five words? And I said, no, I think I'm good. Like, I'm not interested. And he responded with like, oh, I'm so sorry. You know, sometimes I get nervous and I talk a lot. I'd love to make it up to you, and maybe I'm the dick, but I was like, no. Like, we've crossed that bridge. We're good. I mean, that wasn't an awful date, but it's just an example of, like, just a bad date.
[00:08:36] And I. And I'm not sure. I've talked about Caddyshack Cantina, dude.
[00:08:44] If I have, it's because, like, you need to hear the story again because it's so funny. Meet a guy online, seems like a nice guy, kind of last minute. He asked me for happy hour. Like, you want to go grab a drink? Sure. And he's like, you know, we're trying to figure out, like, something in between us, and he suggests this Caddyshack Cantina, which I had never heard of.
[00:09:13] It's about, like, 25 minutes from me, so closer to him. But listen, like, not, like, I'm okay with that. Like, I could drive, get there. He seems really nice. We have a couple beers. He was super flirty in the. In the sense of just, like, you're just a little over the top. Like, you're so beautiful, and, like, I just want to kiss you. And I'm like, like, I don't know if there's chemistry. You don't have to necessarily say those things. I mean, you could tell me I'm beautiful, but. But I don't know. So I had about, I don't know, 3/4 of beer left, and I had to use the restroom. So I get up to use the restroom, and I come back, and he had drank most of my beer. And I'm like, oh. He's like, well, I gotta go. And I'm like, like, you drank my beer? And he's like, well, yeah, I got. I gotta get going. Like, thanks for leaving me the last sip. Like, what the. Like, I just met you. Don't drink my beer.
[00:10:22] Like, you could have left me. Like, you could have been like, hey, I gotta go, and left me. I don't. I'll. I'll pay for my beer. Like, maybe he thought, like, I'm buying the beer, so I should drink. I don't know.
[00:10:34] Okay, so that's weird. We leave. He invites me to go to a concert with him and his sister, but I was like, no. Like, that's. That's not in the cards tonight.
[00:10:44] I get home, we text a little bit. He calls like, I don't know. It was fine. Like, I. I was like, I would see this guy again, minus the beer drinking. God, my standards are low. So I. I invited him out. I was like, let's do brunch on Sunday.
[00:11:02] He responds to me and says, yeah, that sounds great.
[00:11:07] So I say, you pick the time, I'll pick the place.
[00:11:11] And he's like, how about, you know, 10:30 at the Caddyshack Cantina?
[00:11:20] Okay. When a girl says they want to go to brunch, they mean, like, mimosas and fancy eggs and lattes and, you know, like, lingering enjoyable. Sit on a patio. Like, breakfast brunch, not Caddyshack. Can Tina. Which I didn't even know if I can serve breakfast. So I respond with, oh, like, where we just were.
[00:11:47] And do they have Brunch. And his response is like, yeah, they have a killer breakfast.
[00:11:54] And I was like, well, maybe, like, we could try something different.
[00:11:59] Oh, and I forgot to mention that his friends own the Caddyshack Cantina. Which I understand, but, like, bro, you gotta. You gotta step outside your bubble a little bit. Just a little. Because, you know, maybe you get a discount. Maybe you're just super comfortable there. I don't know. But, like, let's not make this a thing, you know? So it's like, well, maybe we go somewhere different. How about this place? Or this place? And he's like, no, I think we should just go to Caddyshack Cantina.
[00:12:28] And like. And then I was like, okay. Like, I find. Like, I don't even know what to say at this point. I'm like, I. I've tried. Like, okay, I guess. And then. And then he's like, well, but if you're really not comfortable with it, like, we can go somewhere else. And at this point, I'm just like. I'm annoyed and I'm wondering, am I the asshole? Like, am I the asshole that's making a thing of this? Because I don't want to go back to the same place we had a beer.
[00:12:52] Because it's just. I mean, it. It was nice. The people were great. The bar, like, the beer was good.
[00:13:02] And, like, I asked, you know, friends, and one was like, yeah, like, that's a little weird. One was like, well, you know, he's just. He's. This is his comfort zone. No, I just don't get it. So the morning of. I just couldn't do it, and I. I had a headache. I know. Horrible person. But, like, I just couldn't fucking do it.
[00:13:24] So. Okay.
[00:13:27] A week goes by. We don't have brunch, breakfast or beers at 10:30 on a Sunday. But I get a text from him, and he's like, hey, you want to do happy hour? I'm at the Caddyshack Cantina.
[00:13:42] Oh, my God, No, I don't want to fucking do happy hour at the Caddyshack Cantina. No. You know, and then I had to send a text. Like, I just. I don't know. I just can't. I can't date you. I don't. Maybe I'm the asshole, but, like, have at least three bars. You rotate between at least. Or be willing to go where the closer to the woman's house. Again, I'm not asking for a lot. I'm not asking you to pay. I'm not. Like, I don't fucking care. I just have a little originality.
[00:14:15] Be. Yeah, Be a little original.
[00:14:19] No offense. Caddyshack and Tina, you guys were great.
[00:14:24] You know, like. And those are just two dates from the last year. Like, that's.
[00:14:31] It's exhausting. And so when I talk about Sam and that, I'm hopeful. Like, I really am hopeful.
[00:14:40] I'm really. I've been burnt a little bit, and I'm. I'm a little discouraged. But I want to be hopeful, and I want to believe that what I want exists.
[00:14:54] And I'm not saying it's him. I'm just saying, like, I still want that belief and that hope. Okay, so today's funny.
[00:15:04] I have to open my phone so I can describe this. This image to you guys. So. So you've heard I'm on raw, the dating app. And on Raw, you get to post. Like, you have to post a picture daily. And then it does, like, another capture from your front camera. So you does a selfie, and then it does a picture of your front camera. This guy, I don't know where he lives. Rod.
[00:15:29] I wish I could share the picture, but, like, I probably can't. But. Okay, so I'm going to describe it for you. So the front camera. There are two Bush light cans of beer stacked up in this, like, cubby thing.
[00:15:44] There's just a bunch of garbage all over. It appears to be maybe a desk, a dresser.
[00:15:51] I don't know. There's wood paneling in the back.
[00:15:55] Do you remember? See, I'm over 40, so I can share these things. When you were younger, if you were in my generation, like, when you had a paper plate at a picnic, there was these plastic holders that you would put the plate in to make it stronger because the. The paper plates weren't very strong. There's one of those.
[00:16:15] You can keep. Zoom. There's like, a Godzilla video game, a Arizona iced tea can. There's a wrapper. There's a dirty.
[00:16:28] I don't know, something gross and dirty. There's a phone number on an envelope. There's a. The Breakfast Club dvd. A surge protector. It's just like a fishing lure. Maybe something of the galaxies. Guardian of the galaxies, maybe Video game, Some more garbage. Like, it literally, like.
[00:16:51] Sorry, it looks like.
[00:16:54] It just looks disgusting. Like you live like a fucking rat. And I'm sorry you're trying to get a date. Like, I'm not gonna date him based on a billion other reasons, but, like, block the fucking lens or take a picture somewhere else where I'm not staring at your garbage. I actually don't know anyone. Anyone who would swipe on this person. The other guy. I forgot about this part. Sorry. In addition to his shit picture, his passions are being lazy. Movies, RV and stripping.
[00:17:31] You guys, this exists. This exists out there. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No. Bro number two, his selfie and the back camera was into a mirror. Like, you forgot that there was a mirror, I don't know. Into a men's disgusting bathroom.
[00:17:52] Why people need to take pictures of themselves in bathrooms that are disgusting. I don't know. Like, women that do it and it's like this beautiful, like, Bellagio, like, bathroom. Fine, but, like, that's just not.
[00:18:11] Oh, we could see Rob strip. You guys. Everybody's day would be better.
[00:18:16] Sorry, Rob. All right, you guys, thanks for listening. I appreciate everyone and have an amazing day.
